Anyone who has actually read through the pages of my blog before will know that my mother and I have a somewhat sketchy relationship with the concept of "sharing" the kitchen.
Don't get me wrong, my mother is a fabulous cook. I'm lucky that I have been exposed to many an exotic dish (be them all mushroom free - my mum's allergic...think this kind of allergic...) and palatable delights that extend beyond "bangers and mash" and "toad in the hole".
However, she being the dominant female in the house, she has developed a somewhat...God complex over the kitchen, actually all the rooms in our house to think of it. Anything that goes wrong in her kitchen is not her fault. Anything that goes wrong in any other room is not her fault. Everything that goes wrong in her kitchen and other rooms is your fault....lol jks it's specifically Ella's fault albeit Ella has never gone into the laundry downstairs but the fact that the washing machine is spewing froth like a rabid turtle MUST mean that I willed it that way. Seriously, I must've been sitting at work in front of the computer willing it to happen. Soz mum won't use my epic jedi mind tricks to fuck up the washing machine ever ever ever again.
"Datz juzz me being Obi lolza! Got paid SoOoOoOo mcuh 4 dat gig! Lyk Georgie Lucas luffed my style nd sence ov flow"
No I'm not just being a teenager...Exhibit A.
*Picture a cool, calm collected Tuesday night, Mum's putting dinner on the table...we're rushing to table...sitting at table...beginning to eat food that is on said table...
"Yum this is delicious!" - Dad
"Om nom nom" - Me
"Mnmnmnmhghg" - Primitive brothers
"Where's the salt?" - Mum
"I don't know, didn't you use it when you were cooking?" - Ella
"Yeah, why'd you move it?"- Mum
"Um, I just walked in the door...how could I have moved it?"- Ella
"Obviously you've put it somewhere; where is it?"- Mum
"Clearly you've used it whilst creating this dish of obvious delectability and have misplaced it in the pantry; would you like me to get up and find it for you?" - Ella
"No just tell me where you put it"- Mum
"I didn't touch it."- Ella
"Yes you did"- Mum
"No I didn't"- Ella
"Stop friggen around Ella WHERE'S THE SALT?"- Mum
"MY JEDI MIND TRICKS MUST BE GETTING SO POWERFUL I CAN NOW MAKE SALT DISAPPEAR! NEXT IS PEPPER! NEXT IS THE MOON!"- Ella
"Go to your room." - Mum
*Walks to room carrying delicious meal
*Calls out from room
"Hey mum why'd you put this salt shaker under my pillow?"- Ella
*Quiet...
"Don't come out of there until Saturday" - Mum
It was pretty funny because I found the salt shaker in the fridge next to the cordial jug.
Anyway, nuff with the stories.
Mum had a dinner party the other night and decided to give up the God complex for an hour or so and let me make dessert for a bunch of her friends.
This was totally my time to shine. Well, it would've been had I not asked her what she wanted for dessert.
"Oh ma gaaaaaaawwwwd mum I'm going to make the most delicious things ever! How do you feel about chocolate?"
"No"
"Fruit?"
"No"
"Ice-cream?"
"Machine's broken"
"Why?"
"Lost a part"
"Tart?"
"Too big"
"It's a dinner party?"
"I've got half a cow sitting on the barbecue Ella"
"FINE I'LL MAKE DO THEN"
So I sat at work contemplating life and dinner parties and mum's fetish for cookies and the sims 3 and then why i was inside and it was so sunny and then cheese boards and then BOOM the ultimate "Oh I ate too much dinner at this party I have no room to appreciate dessert but oh this is little and delicious I'll have a try of this" idea came to mind...
BISCOTTI!
White Chocolate Coated Hazelnut and Cinnamon Biscotti...
If you haven't heard of biscotti before it's a lovely little biscuit that means "twice baked" in Italian. You can pretty much substitute any of the "flavouring" ingredients to suit your taste and you can do savoury and sweet! Try pistachios...cranberries...candy canes (truly)...
I thought, booyah my Mother's cookie fetish cannot possibly resist the deliciousness that is the biscotti.
So I made these four different types of biscotti to be served post dinner party main meal - two types of savoury and two types of sweet - satisfy both cravings.
My idea was to serve the savoury with gourmet cheese (oh ma gaaawd totez buy yourself some Clarins cheese they featured on Masterchef from the dude from Cheese Slices...all due respect man but you must do some chronic bowel workouts from all the cheese you get around...)
and the sweet with little pots of chocolate dipping sauce; we used pots of melted lindt white chocolate and 80% lindt dark chocolate. Om nom nom nom I just wanted to rub it all over my face and my body and then eat myself. What a tasty little biscotti I would be.
I sourced the recipes from four different websites
But I'll just list the most delicious and prettiest and the most photogenic one - Dried Blueberry and Pinenut Biscotti - here so you don't have to keep scrolling...and scrolling...and scrolling...and scrolling....
Dried Blueberry and Pinenut Biscotti adapted from Cafe Lynnylu
Should probs buy a new baking tray...ayyyyyeeeeeee...
Greedy-ents
2 large eggs
2/3 cup sugar
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla
2 cups all-purpose flour (+ any extra for good biscotti consistency)
1 cup pine nuts
1 cup dried blueberries (You can get these from the nutshack at James Street Markets; kinda exy but delicious nonetheless)
Dash of cinnamon
Dash of lemon juice
Methodation
Preheat oven to 175°C. Line a large baking sheet with baking paper. In a medium bowl, beat the eggs, sugar, baking powder, and vanilla until creamy looking. When properly beaten, the egg/sugar mixture will be thick and lemon coloured and drop in a ribbon from the beater.
Lower the mixer speed and add the flour, beating gently until incorporated. Stir in dried blueberries and pine nuts. Dough will be sticky, so coat your hands in flour or lightly dust the "log" to make transferring and shaping a bit easier.
Transfer the dough to the prepared baking sheet and shape into a rough log. Kind of like a giant elephant poo :)
Bake the dough for 25 minutes. With dried fruit and nuts, it may be necessary to bake an additional 5-10 minutes. Remove from oven and let cool on pan from 5-25 minutes. I let mine cool about 15 minutes. Lightly brush the dough with water (use a pastry brush or your finger...whatever is accesible/clean) Let stand 5 minutes. Cafe Lynnlu says that this will soften the crust to make slicing easier.
Reduce oven temperature to 150 degrees. Then cut the biscotti on the diagonal into slices of however thick you want your biscotti to be (i like mine thick so they soak up lots of coffee/milk/tea/honey/icecream/delicious fluids) using a serrated knife and straight up and down motions.
Bung the biscotti on the prepared baking sheet. Bake for 25 minutes. Remove from the oven and transfer to a rack to cool. Store in an airtight container to preserve their texture. If the biscotti aren't as hard as you like, store uncovered overnight to continue drying. Biscotti can be stored at room temperature for two weeks; for longer storage, wrap airtight and freeze. Yields like...a billion if you slice thinly...not a billion if you slice thickly :)
This take on biscotti sliced to the side like that looks aweomse. I can't wait to try it with one of our regular biscottis. Thanks for the post.
ReplyDelete